Feng-Shui Me!

Ok- so that’s not exactly how it works, but man wouldn’t that be great?
What is Feng (Fung) Shui ( Shway) anyway?
According to one definition found on the web it is " the ancient Chinese philosophy and practice of creating harmonious environments."
With a definition like that you would think the first rule would be to throw out all the kids and then the husband and family dog!
But No... one of the major things in the article stated that you should place your desk so that your chair faces the door to allow the Ch’i to flow...
Oh and for those who are not Chineseology literate... Ch’i ( cheeeee) is basically your life force. And I know you all want a positive Ch’i so turn your desks around... the boss won’t mind!
Another principle of Feng-Shui that I read in a book... yep there’s a whole section just on how to decorate your house in Feng-Shui fashion at the public library ( you did not think I paid for a book with words I can barely pronounce did you?)... is that you should never place the head of your bed against the wall with the toilet on the other side... Makes for VERY BAD CH’I . And rightfully so I say. I never get a good night’s sleep listening to the toilet run on all night and the water dripping from the faucet. Although the book also said that water features in the home helped to create a calm and relaxed atmosphere that lended itself to the Positive Flow of the Ch’i so maybe I just did not appreciate that role of the dripping water faucet...
Nope, on second thought I appreciated it... I appreciated that hubby needs to check the darn washer and make it stop dripping!!!
By far my favorite Feng-Shui principle is ELIMINATE CLUTTER... so that means that I can get rid of the kids and hubby and the family dog? Oh, no, that means that I have to throw away the junk mail and clean out that bottom drawer in the fridge and sort thru the shoe boxes full of old photos and actually DO something with them? Yeah, I’ll get right on that as soon as I turn my desk around, move the furniture in my bedroom to the other wall and install a water-wall in my living room for effect...
But then again getting rid of the kids, hubby and the family dog would be easier?
I know, I’ll send the kids to school, hubby to work and let the dog out with a nice bouncy ball he can chase for a few hours...
Voila’- Instant Feng-Shui- the creation of a harmonious environment without all the work.... and those Ancient Chinese thought they had all the answers... I guess this modern American Woman is capable of finding a few of her own!