I have fallen into a funk.
That place where my thoughts run rampant but my body just doesn't seem to have the energy to keep up...
That place where I find myself in the cold, dead of winter...
That place that makes me doubt my purpose in life...
and feel helpless and listless and drained.
I have been in this place more times in my life than I'd like to admit.
I always come out of it, but each time it feels like a piece of me is forever gone...
Unretrievable... although I am sure that is NOT a real word...
it is what I feel happens to me with each episode of this funk that I encounter.
I know that life is what you make of it...
I put on a happy face...
I do what needs to be done...
but my motivation to do more....
to be more....
seems to have left me.
I know that it will get better.
When the sun shines brighter...
and the earth warms in the spring....
my outlook on life will improve.
Until then, I will continue to do what I must...
to take care of those I love...
and who love me...
Because that is what a good wife...
a good mother...
a good daughter...
does...
3 comments:
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POSH
You captured the struggle beautifully.
Please make sure that while you're striving to be good (and only you can decide what to really spend your minimal energy on) you also take care of yourself. Even a small indulgence or break. We baby our kids when they are sick, why not do a little of the same for ourselves?
Ok, think of me as your own personal self help book. Here's a tip for the winter blues: Watch the movie Fargo. I don't care where you live, there is no winter worse than Fargo. You'll feel like your in Southern CA after you watch that movie. And my only other word of wisdom is "chardonnay". It's amazing how the 2 of those will bring you out of a funk in no time! *wink
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