The End is Near... THANK GOD!!!

It has been a rough 6 weeks at our house.
Or rather I should say for TeenBoy and SIX.

First SIX breaks his arm in the second to the last play of the last game of the year... 3 days after his 12th birthday.

Then TeenBoy puts his hand through his bedroom window because he missed the lamp shade he was trying to kill...
And then he fell through the attic to the second floor hall- taking out a light fixture and the smoke detector along the way... just missing the stairwell... Thank God - seriously Thanks, he could have been killed!

And then?

Silly us. HeMan Hubby and I went to a Christmas Open House. Or so we thought.
About an hour and half into the party the cell phone rang.

It was SmartGirl.
SIX and TeenBoy were horsing around in the house so she yelled at them.

Did they stop?
Heck No.

They took it outside.
Into the snow.
In t-shirts and shorts.
Without any shoes on.

SIX slipped on a patch of black ice running across the driveway.
He couldn't catch himself... broken hand - remember?
Cracked his chin, took out a hunk of skin to the bone.

The call came in at 9:12pm.We were in the car by 9:26pm for the 45 minute ride home.
He was at the ER by 10:45pm. We left the ER at 1am with 5 sutures in his chin leaving behind a basin full of the asphalt they took out of it.

Do you know what SmartGirl and ManBoy said?

We took too long to get home... what? Found our coats, said goodbye, dislodged the vehicle from the parking mess then drove home, changed clothes, gathered SIX into the car, drove to the ER and checked in a mere hour and a half later???

When they are parents I hope they each have 4 boys... all a year apart... and really good health insurance.

A week until it's almost almost Christmas!

Yes. Today is the day that I start the count down to Christmas.

It goes something like this...
There are 18 days to Christmas which is really only 14 since after the 21st really, who wants to be anywhere near a store or mall?
And once the 14th gets here in a week there is really just that one week left until Christmas and only one weekend left to hit the mall like a madman, woman, er, person.

And with Christmas on a Saturday and only 2 more of those until it gets here, it really is almost almost Christmas.
A party on the 11th... HeMan Hubby's co-worker.
A party in the 18th... fellow DeMolay advisors
A party on the 19th... the Holiday Party for needy kids that our DeMolay chapter hosts every year... this is year 59!

Then Wham! It's the week of Christmas and baking and wrapping of presents and cleaning and packing of clothes for the holiday trip to visit relatives down south commences.

Yes.
Today marks the beginning of the end of the
Holiday Season.
The culmination of the weeks, months, days of anticipation created by Cable TV programming and the Retail Establishments and a Greeting Card company.

Happy 15th 

Oh, and today is TeenBoy's birthday.
He's 15.
He's lucky.
He almost didn't make it this far.
(ceiling, stitches... read back a few posts & you'll see why)

And...
Today is the 69th anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor.
Just wanted to make you sure you don't  forget that very important fact on your way to the Christmas rush...

TeenBoy Trivia: He was named for a WWII vet and arrived nearly 3 weeks early to be born on this day ...

Time to find the Christmas decorations... Thanksgiving 2010 2 1/2

Oh - I almost forgot... as  I sit here with my knee on a pillow thanking GOD that we had green beans instead of the Frozen Peas for T-giving dinner...( you'll find out why in Part 3)

the boys- the ones with only one good hand each... the ones I asked to ask HeMan Hubby where he put the Xmas tree... go walking up the stairs with a step ladder... as I call out to them to NOT GO INTO THE ATTIC... yeah yeah we got it they say...

Then THUMP! CRASH! WHAM! 

Yeppers, drywall and insulation and one TeenBoy falling thru the ceiling...

Can this HOLIDAY be over yet?

I used to feel sorry for kids left at boarding school for the holidays...

Now?

I sort of envy their parents!

PS

HeMan Hubby came to the rescue.

He pulled some drywall that was just chilling in the basement and got the hole covered.

The really cool part is that he made TeenBoy help him... to atone for his stubbornness

But that's not the cool part, the really cool part is that I could hear HeMan Hubby explaining how to measure the area and how to cut the drywall and put it up so the seams would be hidden once taped and mudded and the stucco pattern to match the rest of the ceiling was done.

And TeenBoy? He listened and asked questions and actually learned a thing or two...

While spending some time hanging with his Dad doing some Guy Stuff...

I guess sometimes things really do happen for a reason...

Just when you start thinking your kids are growing up... Think Again!

Kids.

You gotta love tthem.

Except when you might actually hate them.

But then, you don't really hate them, you just don't like them so much.

Anyone with teens knows what I mean.

Exactly what I mean.

Today I am not so loving TeenBoy and Manchild. 

Why?

I used to have a really nice breakfast bar on my kitchen island.

Now I have a really nice partial breakfast bar on my kitchen island.

And a really pretty piece of butcher block pine...

Yeah, today I am so not loving those boys.

Home Coming Weekend... A Night To Remember?

TeenBoy had his first High School Experience this past week. 


SPIRIT Week came to a crescendo last Friday afternoon with a Pep Rally, followed by the JV then Varsity Homecoming football games.


Which they lost.


Again.


Like every other game this season.


But...
They did not give up.
They did not surrender.
They did not stop giving their all...


Even when their own fans stopped cheering madly.
Stopped waving banners.

'WIN IT'.... yes, they tried

Stopped paying attention to the game.

The JV players kept the Varsity guys pumped up...         

They soldiered on 
Fought the good fight...




Then went their separate ways as the crowds dispersed;
their classmates and friends all went home.


Only to reconvene for the Homecoming Dance Saturday Night.


TeenBoy experienced this Rite of Passage into Teen-dom
And he went with a girl... friend.
A friend who's a girl?


$200.00 suit jacket, $40.00 tickets, $35.00 orchid, and a tie...


And in the words of HeMan Hubby...


"All that money and all he got was a girlfriend?"


Yes.
TeenBoy is now 'in a relationship' with his date for the dance.


I know this to be true because...


It's says so on FaceBook!

Remote Control

Who here knows what a remote control is?
Ok, stupid question, or is it?
There are remote controls in my home for the TV, stereo, DVD player, ceiling fan, garage door... and I am sure there are some for hubby's techie things that I have no inkling of.
However, I think that in our house we may be missing the most important remote control.
What else is there you ask?
Remote--- means what? Away or from a distance. And Control? Well it means to manage or to have exclusive handling of a thing or person. Look at the words in this way and remote control means to manage a thing or person from a distance. Remote can also mean isolated. So to manage and isolate something or someone...
In our home we are loud and active and , well a bunch of gregarious game-playing, sports-watching, competitive people. Of these the worst is probably the competitiveness, and I am the most guilty. I have always been competitive and have spent my life striving to do better, be more, exceed and succeed at everything and anything that I do.
I now have a 13 year old son who is very competitive, and like all 13 year old boys he is growing. Not just in height, but in physical and emotional ways that teen aged boys cannot adequately be prepared for. This is where the missing remote control comes in ( bet you thought I forgot what I was talking about again, didn't you?) To manage and isolate something... I think that we have not taught our son, me most especially, to manage and isolate his feelings of angst and aggression. To take hold of his competitiveness and funnel that energy and drive into less angry expressions and activities and into more focused and, dare I say it, controlled and structured outlets. And I think that I need to help him find a way to monitor his thoughts so that he does not feel that he has to suppress his feelings and try to be something he is not. Let' s face it. Being a 13 year old boy is hard, but in these times of economic uncertainty, constant peer pressure and the need for approval added to the pressure to succeed in school- from pre-k through 12th grade so you can get into a good college, excel at extracurricular sports as soon as you can walk so you have a chance to get a scholarship and the expectations that every parent has for their child to be THE BEST at everything... Who wants to be 13 again?? Really, anyone? You there in the back jumping about wildly waving your arms... you don't count because you haven't reached puberty yet!
All kidding aside, has our society put these pressures on our teen boys, or have we as 40-somethings who grew up in a time when not everyone could go to college because there was no money, or because we did not realize the good grades had to start in kindergarten or because , well I'll just say it, our parent's didn't go and they turned out fine; are we the ones who have pushed and prodded our children to become over-acheivers, with more hectic schedules than our own, with no down time to just be a normal teen ager with the normal highs and lows emotionally and physically?
In my case I will admit to expecting my son to do his best and be the best at everything he does. This is what was expected of me as a child and I fared not too badly.But, perhaps I have not taken the time to nuture his emotional side and emerging sense of self. Because he is extremely intelligent I find that I expect more from him than of my other 5 children at this age. I have done my son a disservice and I need to find a way to let him know. I also have to find a way to help him voice his feelings and to nuture him and let him grow, inside and out, into the amazing and caring and absolutely wonderful human being that I know he really is.
What prompted me to go down this road to self-awareness and acceptance of my failure ( GOD I hate that word! I hate to fail at anything, but this is the only thing that I cannot afford to fail at-- being THE BEST parent I can be) as a parent to my 2nd son. I expected him to be like his big brother and did not change this expectation as he grew, even though I knew he was a totally different kind of kid. This is my shortcoming as The Mom and I have to take responisibility for this. Again, why am I worried about this at this particular time? He has grown more than a foot and gained over 30 pounds in the last 10 months. He is as tall as I am and stronger than I had imagined. He also has a quick temper and the mouth to go with it. He has gotten into trouble at school for lashing out at other students twice this year. He needs to learn to reign in his temper and to step back, to attempt to see things from another's point of view... he needs to learn that he is not always right and that sometimes the feelings of others are so much more important than being right or being the best... he has to learn REMOTE CONTROL over himself and I think that that lesson has to start at home. And I believe that it will start by him reading this entry and seeing that evaluating ones self is important, but owning up to and changing the things you see are problems is even more so.
I think he and I have some hard lessons ahead, but I KNOW that the missing Remote Control in our house is about to be found and put to use. And I know that he can only get better and be more wonderful because of it.
Me on the other hand, I am not sure how I'll fare, so if I send out an SOS please come rescue me from an opinionated, hard-headed and stubborn young man... oh forget it, he is just like me so I will just have to deal and maybe I will learn a few things from him along the way.