Life Got In the Way

Yes. Life did get in the way.

But then, it's the living of life that makes us.
Both the good and the bad things that happen while living our lives.

Sometimes it seems there is a lot more bad than good.
Right now is one of those times.

Yesterday a dear friend died.
I had the pleasure of being able to take care of her, keep her comfortable, and even to give her comfort during her last day with us.

For that I am thankful.

Every person has a purpose.

I believe that my purpose is most often as a caretaker.

And usually I don't mind giving comfort, offering support, being there when others need a shoulder or a body to lean on.

Right now...
there have been too many deaths in my circle of friends for me to bear.

Sheila Kaye Davis         1976-2011

I will persevere.
I will carry on.
I will because there is no other choice but to go on.

And by so doing I will honor my friends who have left me behind...
Cindy and Sheila...

I'm the one that's left... I'll try to make you all proud of me.

And I'll try to get back to blogging regularly and my diet and...

well, Living My Life!

Thanksgiving 2010 Part 1

My beautiful family... a couple or 6 Thanksgivings ago!
TeenBoy HeManHubby BratChild Me SIX
SmartGirl ManBoy GoodMom

Ahhh, another Thanksgiving under the belt... or in some cases hanging over it.
A day filled with family and friends. Good food and better drink ... 
Eggnog people! 


Pageants with children dressed up as Pilgrims and Indians
 who dance and sing and yell out 'Hi Mom!'


This is the day that we all love and live...
thru the movies on television, that is.


Mom in a dress and heels, Dad in a suit and tie
The kids are clean and fresh come to the table in shirts and ties
 and skirts with ribbons in their hair.


At my house I'm lucky if TeenBoy puts a t-shirt on before he sits down.


And me?
After cooking a 19 lb turkey and 11 lb ham... making 15 lbs of mashed potatoes and 5 lbs of my wonderful stuffing... 2 pumpkin and 1 deep-dish sugar-free pies... 


Hey!
I'm lucky if I can squeeze in a shower AND put on some make-up BEFORE the guests arrive.


And by guests, I mean family. Who are technically guests, but not really so...
Do I have to observe hostess etiquette and offer drinks and hors d'oeurves?
I sincerely hope not, cuz I don't. 


Not that I would love to, but because I'm too busy trying to get someone to set the table... including the silver ware... oh yeah, and the napkins PLEASE! 


Finally, Finally! 


We sit, after managing to find 12 chairs... oops! We needed 13 this year...
We sit, except TeenBoy who stands because he has no chair...
we say Grace, er, my father says Grace...


as my lovely granddaughter, FancyPants, sits between GoodMom and I with her little hands clasped in front of her as her great-grandfather says a prayer...


Yeah, that's what Thanksgiving is all about...


yeah, that and a week off from school so kids can drive their parents insane...
But that's another story ... Thanksgiving 2010 Part 2.. COMING SOON!

Today is Sunday... a day for recharging the soul

Sunday. 
The day of rest.
But in reality, is there ever a day of rest for any of us?
Sleeping in ... all the way to 7am!
Laundry and cleaning and preparing for the week ahead.
These are the things I do on my day of rest.

You will show me the path of life.

In your presence is fullness of joy...

psalm 16:11

But more importantly, my day of rest is my day to recharge my soul.


To take the time to watch the sunlight shining through the window, lighting up the dust motes as the float by.


To take the time to relax with a child or 2 and watch TV... infomercials, Disney movies, Phineas and Ferb... whatever. It's a time to just enjoy spending time doing nothing with them.


To make the time to Thank God that I am able to see the gifts he has given me.


To stop and smell the proverbial roses along life's path and remember that no matter what God will accept me, forgive me, boost me up and walk with me...


For as long as I want him there...
and yes, even if I don't.

Another day in the life of the BusyBusy Family...did the Fat Lady sing yet???

MASONIC CHIP PROGRAM


It's been a busy weekend for the BusyBusy Family, and it's not over yet!

Yesterday was the funeral for GoodMom's father in law.

He died on Memorial Day, after mowing the lawn.
It was unexpected... and sudden.
Awful, but good, too, in a way.
In that is was quick and not painful I mean...

We had prior commitments and as I so often find myself, I was jockeying kids from one place to another becasue, when you say you will do something, YOU DO IT!

We managed to get them all done, and the kids, although whiney about it at first, actually had a good time.

After the funeral I had to take BratChild and SIX to meet up with TeenBoy at a local festival where he was helping the Masons with their CHIP program.

What IS CHIP you ask?

Very good question, and something every parent needs to know about.

CHIP stands for Child Id Program, and is a nationwide program that takes information from parents/guardians of children of all ages AND puts it into a file that can be read by any law enforcement agency in the country.

Personal data, fingerprints, photos and a video ( for voice recognition and mannerisms) are done right there on a single computer, in minutes, with the end result a packet containing a CD with all the data on it, printed ID form with photo ID sections that can be laminated to carry in a wallet, and a DNA swab.
Once home you swab your child's inner cheek, then return it to it's wrapper and place in the packet envelope.
The packet can then be stored in a cool, dry place- readily accessible for vacations or if, God Forbid, and I so seriously mean that, it is needed in a hurry.

The coolest part about this is that in an emergency you just hand the CD to a law enforcement officer and they can slide it into the computer in their official vehicle and press a button and VOILA' ...

Amber Alert is out NATIONWIDE in seconds... WOWSERS!

Is that not cool, or what?

The other MOST AWESOME part is that this service is FREE.

The program software and hardware is provided by the State Police and is compatible with the 2 programs used nationwide.

Masonic Lodges all over the country have purchased these units and provide this service to anyone FREE OF CHARGE...

The Masons are a community service organization, after all, and the welfare of children is their priority.

Mason's sponsor children's hospitals, cancer centers and research, MS research, eye and hearing clinics...

and so much more...

Do you have a school or community event coming up that NEEDS this service there???

Just contact your local Masonic Lodge and ask about the CHIP program.
They'll be happy to help and you won't meet a nicer group of men who really care about their community....

Because community means family and the Mason's are all about Family...

The only problem I found is...
That in all the hectic-ness of the day I FORGOT to get my own kids done!

Next time I will...

Really, I WILL!

Honor and Duty... and so much more

Memorial Day.

A day to relax by the pool, put your feet up and enjoy time spent with family and friends.

That's what it has become.
That's not REALLY what it's for... although don't get me wrong, I do as much of that as the next gal!

Memorial Day... Memory Day... A day to Remember the WHOs and WHATs and WHEREs that made us, as a nation, able to spend time pursuing the joys of our family and friends.

Those men who stood up and fought for US-- as in us, the citizens of the United States, and US as in Uncle Sam... those who stormed the beaches of Normandy in June 1944, who fought in the jungles on Viet Nam in the early 60's, and those who fought in the corn fields, valleys and forests of this nation during the American Revolution, the Civil War... and all the periods of civil unrest through out our nation's short, but poignant history.

Saturday ManBoy, BratChild and SIX walked in a local Memorial Day Parade as representatives of Freemasonry, Order of Rainbow for Girls, and DeMolay.

SIX, my 11 1/2 year old youngest son and our 6th child, took turns carrying the DeMolay banner with another young DeMolay over the course of the 1 mile parade route.
At the onset of the parade, well, at the staging area actually, the boys saw several men in full military uniform and wearing baseball caps with their ship or service on them. I explained that they were Veterans of WW II, Korea, Viet Nam, Desert Storm and those currently serving in the military.

During the parade I saw that each boy, when not carrying the banner, would go up to men along the parade route and shake hands with the men in uniform and wearing the hats I had pointed out earlier.

Six and CC were thanking the soldiers for their service with a smile and a firm handshake. One older gentleman wearing a WWII cap burst into tears when SIX asked to shake his hand. Six was taken aback. He thought he had done something wrong, when in reality, he had done exactly the right thing for this lone man sitting in his wheelchair on his front lawn watching his hometown parade, just as he has probably done for 40 years or longer.

I saw a young Marine, in full dress uniform salute one of the Masons marching with ManBoy as he passed. In my mind's eye I saw MW, ManBoy's childhood friend, who is himself a Marine who has done service in Iraq. Pride filled my heart as the tears filled my eyes.

As we passed the Grand Marshall our groups were announced and met with much applause and approval. And SIX and CC were astounded to hear the man I had seen saluted being thanked for his service on D-Day on Omaha Beach.

When we returned to the lodge after the parade for lunch, CC approached this man and asked if it was true.
"No", the man replied. "He got it wrong. I wasn't at Omaha, I had an easy time of it. I hit land at Utah Beach."

CC and SIX shook his hand and told him thank you.

And they meant it.

And I was so very proud of an 11 and a 13 year old boy, who showed in that one short morning of community duty, the men they are becoming.

My heart swelled with pride and my eyes filled with tears and I thought...

Charlie and Kurt would be so very proud of them, their little brothers.

I know I am.

PS- I read a post at Blue Cotton Memory yesterday... it's full of wonderful quotes by George Washington, Ronald Reagan, GW Bush, and my all-time favorite, Dwight Eisenhower.

What's In A Name?.... Apparently Everything!

My family has finally read some of my posts.

I have no idea if they like what I write or not, but I do know they DO NOT like the names I have given them.

So from this day forward GirlChild will be SmartGirl... she is a college graduate after all, and TeenGirl will be known as BratChild, which IS what I call her here at home most days anyway.

So, my family now consists of HeMan Hubby, GoodMom and her daughter FancyPants, SmartGirl, ManBoy, TeenBoy, BratChild and TweenBoy, who I should probably find a better name for since he will soon be a teen too... I am sure one will find it's way to him naturally in the near future anyway.

Names, those titles and descriptive adjectives that are given to us as children, will follow throughout our lives. Somehow this just doesn't seem fair.
How do our parents, or those giving the names, know what we will be like when we grow up.

Maybe a girl named Blanche will grow up to have dark hair and eyes and be a really grumpy person... Blanche- meaning white or fair of hair and face- would just not fit at all.

A lawyer named Honey? A doctor named Windy? Or grown people with names like Moon and Six and Apple? Who would take these people seriously, other than the Hollywood crowd?

HeMan Hubby wanted me to seriously consider naming TweenBoy, Six.
Why? you may ask. Because he is the 6th child. I vetoed this from the start only to find that NOW TweenBoy thinks that would be a cool name!
But then, he is only 11, so what does he know of the world of grownups with strange names?

My name is one I have strongly disliked my whole life. But, when compared to the other choice my parent's had on the table, I'll keep the one I got, Thank You Very Much!

My children's given names were something I put a lot of thought into. They had to have good or positive meanings, they had to be names that sounded professional, on the off chance one of my kids became a doctor or lawyer or college professor, and they had to fit with the heritage of our families.

Owing to all that my children have somewhat unusual names, but not made up or farfetched. They have names that are found throughout history and in the bible. They have names that represent the various countries of origin found on our Family Tree- or in some cases Family Wreath, but that's the West Virginia side, mostly.

As children, some of them did not like their names, but as they have gotten older, they do.

Of this I am glad, as it took a very long time to come up with them in the first place, and because in every one of my children the positive qualities of the meanings of their names is actually present in them.

Did the name influence the child, or was the child destined to be what he or she is all along?

I have no idea, but the tradition of finding the right name with just the right meaning continued in our family with the naming of FancyPants.
Her parents struggled with finding just the right combination of sounds, syllables and meanings to give their firstborn child.

In the end, the name is perfect, as is the little girl.

What's in a name?

Apparently, everything!

(Just ask my sister!)

It's not about a game, it's about life... and how to live it the right way... God, I hope I get it right!

One of the reasons I started blogging, this blog in particular, is that I wanted to try to find ME. Not ME the Mom, or ME the nurse, or wife or PTA president or volunteer or jewelry maker or crochet designer or mad bird-breeder lady...

But ME... who I am and what makes me tick.

That's tick, not get ticked-off.

I watched a lot of TV last week, being as I was laid out on the couch in agony from my back and all. There's not a lot of good TV going on during the day, I don't care how many channels you have!

But, I did manage to get 'The Blindside', or rather when GirlChild called from the Wal-Mart where I had sent her to pick up a few things so we wouldn't starve to death, and reminded me that it was now available, along with 'New Moon', and how she knew I wanted to get both of them and since she was there, and using my money anyway, shouldn't she just pick them up too?

Well of course she should! And she did. And I watched 'The Blindside'.

And I LOVE that woman! The Mom in that movie is the woman I want to be. No, she is the person I want to be. Forget gender or race or bank balance. I want to be that good, and kind and, just plain strong and self-assured.

I love Sandra Bullock and boy-howdy , did they pick a winner in her as the leading lady, Leigh Anne Tuohy.

Okay- I know what you are saying. It's a movie about football... Yeah.It is.
But no, it's really not. Just about football that is.

It's about faith and family and unconditional love... and keeping promises.
It's about being there because you said you would, because you gave your word and that's the most valuable thing a person can give.

I know I joke around A LOT about things my family does or things I do, or wish I'd done. But in this I am most sincere.

I want to be like Leigh Anne Tuohy.

And I want the Leigh Anne Tuohy's of the world to out-number the rest of the population.

I figure, if I dreaming, I might as well dream big....

And well, You can't much bigger than Michael Oher... or his Momma, Leigh Anne Tuohy.

Oh, and just because I live in the Baltimore area, please do not think I am a Ravens fan... I am a Michael Oher and a Redskin fan...

Like I said... I dream BIG...
Go Skins!

Oh- and here is the letter I would have sent Ms. Tuohy if I knew how to get one to her...

Dear Ms. Tuohy,

Thank You for being You.
Thank You for caring about others, and teaching your children to do the same.
And thank your husband for understanding you and who you are and need to be.

From the bottom of my heart and with everything I have, I thank you for the example you set in living the life you do.

I wish you and your family all the best in everything... And even though I am a Redskin fan I watch Michael ( and the Ravens) because I think he is one awesome and very lucky guy... and he is an awesome football player.

Sincerely,

Dawn @ Dawning

Valentine's Day Question and Answer Session... just don't laugh at my answers, Please

What is the one thing your love does for you that you can't live without?
Just being him... sounds corny I know, but just knowing he is there is enough. If he wasn't there I don't think I could make it.


When did you know your love was "the one"?

I can't say I thought that... it was more that he is my other half...

Does your love have a special ringtone on your cell?

That would be assuming I knew how to do that... if he did it would be an Asia song.


What are you attracted to most in your special someone?

His strength and tolerance...


Did you know when/where he/she was going to pop the big question?

Which time? Seriously, he asked me lots of times but I never took him seriously and there was no special, romantic time... we just agreed to a day to go to the courthouse... I wish we could have had a real wedding and would like to someday.

I would love to have my Dream Wedding someday... wearing my Flapper Style Champagne Pink dream dress in a 1930's style cocktail party-like reception... with everyone wearing 1920-30's vintage style.

Are We There Yet? and other things kids ask when you're driving a car...

Yes- the title is exactly what I am posting about today.

I decided to make a list of the things my kids have asked me while I was driving, usually on a 6-lane highway, in rush-hour traffic... which is akin to driving in a NASCAR race and all the other drivers are chimpanzees!

(The names have been ommitted to protect the stupid...some of the answers are given, some, well if you really want to know email me! )

1) Mom, do YOU know what a BJ is?

2) It is SAFE SEX, right?

3) Where do babies come from? ... No- HOW DO THEY GET THERE?

4) If we get married now [insert boyfriend name] says we can live in [govt housing] for a couple hundred a month, and if we have a baby a year [the govt] will pay us to take care of them, and I will work [at part time dead end job] while he stays home with the kids and goes to college
at night because [the govt] will pay for it all... what do you think?

My answer- WTF? Are freaking kidding me! Your life plan is to live off of honest, hard-working
people who are barely getting by ... LIKE ME! And to have babies with [this guy]?

Her answer- ummm... I guess it doesn't sound as good that way.
(No, I did not pull over and beat some sense into her with my very heavy purse... but it was tempting!)

5) I don't think he was cheating with her, do You?

My answer- He was naked on the sofa with a girl who was half naked and you believe they were just 'watching tv'?

Her answer- well, ummm, no I guess not when you put it that way.
( no I did not pull over and beat her with my purse... and yes, she did eventually stop seeing him)

6) Mommy, why is my Pee-Pee hard when I wake up? (from 4 yo son)

My answer- I don't have one so I have no idea... go ask Daddy!

7) It's my room, why can't I have sex there if I want to??? (over 18 child still living in MY house so MY rules!)

My answer- If I can't then neither can you!

8) Which one of us kids do you love most?

My answer- I can't choose... I love you each for your own differences and personalities... although sometimes I don't LIKE any of you!

9) OMG MOM! Do you still do it? I mean Your'e OLD!!!!

My answer- you won't be getting any older if you do not shut up now...

10) WHY do I have to go to college?

followed by

11) Why isn't cutting grass a real job?

No answer was required. The cutting stare was enough to stop this entire conversation and it was never revisited again... Thank You WITCHY MOM face!

These are but a few of the more memorable questions my children have asked in their attempt to gain knowledge, or to cause me to wreck the vehicle and die... either one works.

The Joys of parenthood...

I love Doctor Who, the real one from last season, not the new one... I wonder if he makes house calls?

It's Official! Monday IS the BEST day ... of this week so far that is...
Why? you may ask... especially if you read my post on 'The Secret is in the Sauce' this morning.

The spawn of satan I begat actually ASKED before going to out to play AND the breakfast dishes were in the sink without any help from me! AND they (the 2 smallest spawn - 11 yo son and 12 yo dd) cleaned their rooms all by themselves... Heck they even put the dirty clothes IN THE HAMPER! WooHoo!
The water in the shower- the one I had to take to hide my tears after seeing The Anissa Love video on The Bloggess.com was HOT... I mean really and truly hot, like it made steam and everything!
The DH got himself up for work-- in a timely manner - which means he was on track to only be an hour late-- AND he MADE THE BED!!! I think I shall swoon from the shock!
The pies and cake in the fridge are all still intact... no late-night snacking from the bottomless pit otherwise known as The 20 yo son...
And the Teen From Hell (14 yo son)... he slept until NOON and then got up and MADE HIMSELF FOOD without any whining about there being NOTHING to eat!
And to top it all off the 25 yo Girl-Child offered to pick me up a Janet Evanovich book, or 2 !, from the library!

Did I tell you this was a great day or what?

But Wait!There's More!
And it is the VERY BEST PART!

I got comments on my BLOG from people not in the Friends and Family category... and you know what that means???

I am a writer... for total strangers and the whole world to enjoy!

Okay- maybe not the whole world, yet... but give me a little time to implement, er, begin, er, plan my World Writing Domination and then... well you better watch out for me!... or you could check back here now and again. Or subscribe as a follower and then tell 2 friends who can tell 2 friends who can... you know, like the Faberge Shampoo commercial from the 70's... not that I was alive in the 70's or anything...oh, I know about it cuz I saw it on ...YouTube, that's it... right?

Reading blogs only makes me jealous, then I get depressed so I should have just eaten the chips and dip to begin with...

This is for everyone who quotes song lyrics... girl of 16 whole life ahead of her slashed her wrists bored with life didn't succeed thank the lord for small mercies...
and YES this is one of my FAVORITE songs... another is NUMB by Linkin Park... And you all thought I was not DOPE!
Dope, for those not as DOPE as I, means the same thing as WAY cool, gnarly, and wicked, you know from back when you were a little kid, or at least younger and WAY cooler than you are now.
FaceBook is entertaining and I was concerned when I thought it had left me, but as I stated on my FB status FB hadn't REALLY left me, we were just taking a little break.
During that break I got caught up on some blogs I like ( written by people that are not me that is- although I am not totally sure I like the blogs I write).
Anyway, I read those while watching some DVR'd shows from last week... well I let them play so I can delete them without feeling bad about using up the DVR space on them in the first place.
So, anyhow, once I got caught up on the blog posts I realized that tons of people make comments about them. Like every single post had at least a dozen or more comments on them. And then I took a look at my blog and sure enough right there for all the world to see is ... nothing. Not one single comment.
Ok- I have like 5 people in the world who actually read what I post and most of them are family so I'm not exactly sure they count.
But maybe I am totally off base and more people read what I write, but are just so touched by my words as to be left speechless, or in the case of the internet, temporarily paralyzed from the wrists down?

Well- I got that little tic out of my system and now I want to find the tape of that song I was quoting , but now that I think about it even if I do find the cassette, I have no way to actually play it since the kids broke my boom box and the new van has satellite radio, a cd and 2 ( yes 2) dvd players, but no cassette player...
And now I am really bummed because I can't even download the song to my totally awesome iPod that my equally awesome husband bought me so I could listen to music or watch videos while at work, or at school functions where the music or play may not be as good as what I have on my iPod... but I can't because Not Me- the kid who lives here but is NEVER seen has apparently broken my 40gig ( i think that is what John said it is) iPod and this same kid who I DID NOT give birth to has evidently lost, or borrowed, or sold my iPod Shuffle- the one with my name engraved on it so I can prove to my kids it really is mine?... so now I have to see if I know anyone who may, or may not, have that song on a dvd so I can download it to the computer in my van so I can got outside for REAL music when the kids are playing that Sreamo crap that doesn't even have lyrics so can't really be called songs, now can they?
And you were wondering why my favorite songs are depressing???
Welcome to my life!

Mel Gibson in a kilt and Who is this Mulligan Anyway?

Do-over.

Is that a word?

I hear people say they wish they could be 16 again, or 18 or 30, but really, do they mean they want to go back and relive their lives, have a do-ver?

Or in the language of golf, a Mulligan? And who on earth decided to call it that anyway? I know golf was invented by the Scots but is Mulligan even a Scottish name? My vision of Mel Gibson in Braveheart, full on blue body paint with the wind blowing his kilt around his thighs as he is about to meet his enemy head on in battle, does not include a nine-iron and a little white ball being chased around a big green lawn.


I often wonder what exactly people wanting a do-over actually want to do-over. High school? College? Their first job? First real relationship?

80's hair, Flashdance sweats, pegged pants and lycra in everything was bad enough the first go-round.

High school was abysmal. I didn't fit in with any one group. I was in the band, the national honor society, played soccer, did indoor drill team and flag squad... and I had my first child. I had acquaintances, but no real friends, well except for Kelly and Ginger.
Aside from them all I did was go to high school, nursing school and work until graduation.

So the first marriage, and the second for that matter, didn't work out exactly as planned, but doing them again? Definitely not. My kids once asked if I have any regrets or wish I had done things differently, and honestly, I don't think I do.

I made the choices I made because they were what I had to do. Better insurance, better hours, more time with my kids, nicer neighborhood... these are things that have driven my decisions for the last 20-something years.
And if going back would mean changing my career or mean not having even one of my children, then I'd really rather not... unless... no, never mind...I'll keep the kids I got.

Maybe someone can figure out a way to send criminals back in time to re-live their teen years as punishment for their deeds? Having to be pimple-faced and insecure or abnormally large and clumsy or a geek again would probably fall under the cruel and unusual punishment category so it would most likely be unconstitutional.

A do-over, Mulligan or rewind... call it what you want. I'd rather take the hard-earned lessons my life has taught me and move forward. And hopefully find a way to spare my children the pain I had growing up... well not ALL the pain, but a lot of it certainly.

Because without those lessons and experiences I may not have ever made it to THIS place and time and let's face it, the known is better than the unknown any day...I shudder to think of the mess my life could have ended up in. Okay, the bigger mess...

Living in the Now is certainly hard, but living in the Then would be, well, totally so Not Awesome.
But if someone comes up with a way to get my THEN figure back without a gym, dieting or having to work for it... then Sign Me Up!

Don't Bite Off More Than You Can Chew and other things They say...

Tis the Season to be Jolly... Well, that's what 'THEY' say.

And who exactly are 'They', anyway?

'They' can be anyone. People you know, people you don't know, people you don't ever want to know... so WHY would you listen to 'They' in the first place?

I certainly do not know the answer to that question. Does anyone?

I think 'They' are the ones who made the rules like "no elbows on the table" and "pink and red don't go together" and "no wearing white after Labor Day".

What if I NEED to put my elbows on the table because I drank too much wine and am about to fall of my chair and my elbows are the only thing keeping the room from spinning me like a top? Hmmmm... ?

Or what if I LIKE the way pink and red look together, or red and purple for that matter? Pink and red ARE in the same color family so why can't they be together? I mean, if brown can be the new black and pink the new white and it seems acceptable to put them together...? Brown and pink is a hideously disgusting combination in my opinion but 'They' say it is hip and trendy... I think 'They' must be color-blind... or have a seriously f'd up sense of humor!

And what about this no white after Labor Day thing?
Really? I'm a nurse and , well duh!, white is what we wear... and do white tennis shoes or sneakers not count? Cuz I definitely see white shoes all year long. And white t-shirts. And what about winter white? It's right there in the name- Winter White- so it must be okay for after Labor Day since that would be the 'Winter Season', right?

'They' say the unemployment numbers will get better, and 'They' say the housing market is starting to pick up, and 'They' say the economy is not as bad as we ( meaning the not 'They' people) think it is, and 'They' say we are only in a Recession, not a Depression... well this Recession is pretty depressing to me so I don't really see a difference, do you?

Just once I would like to see someone interview 'They' on TV. I think it would look a lot like a PC vs MAC commercial.


Interviewer- How nice to FINALLY have 'They' here in studio.
'THEY'- Well, you know what 'They' say don't you?
Interviewer- No, actually, what do you say? Any words of wisdom?
'THEY'- Never ask questions you don't already know the answer to... and as 'They' say... don't take any wooden nickels!



Interviewer will be left standing in an empty space where 'They' have just left the building thinking, "WTF?'They' say the dumbest things, don't 'They'?"

'They' certainly seem to have the last word in just about everything...
I am sure 'They' were the ones shaking their heads, as they set sail, while Mt Vesuvius was still burping and hiccuping clouds of smoke and sulphur, saying things like, " You can't take it with you" and "some people never learn!"

And like 'They' always say... " love your neighbor as yourself...".
Okay you got me there, 'They' have never been touted as the brain behind that sentiment but the 'ONE' that has, well, HE's got my vote over the ever-elusive 'They' anyday!

And don't forget... it IS the Season to be JOLLY... but only if YOU say so!

Book Worms Unite!

I love to read. I'll read just about anything, and I mean anything!

My youngest son would ONLY read 'Captain Underpants' stories for a while. What I really mean is, I had to read them for him until he got the whole sound-out-the-letters-then-run-it-all-together thing down.

I actually read most of what the kids read.
One, because I buy them and want to know what they are reading; and two, because I like the darn things!

I read Twilight so I would know what my 11 year old was into-- and because I was thrilled she knew what to do with a book! Then I got hooked on the stupid series... with my 11 year old girl, 13 year old boy and 19 year old son's girlfriend! We passed those books around like they were some miracle cure for male pattern baldness!

Artemis Fowl, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Junie B.Jones, Amelia Bedelia...I have read them all! And I have anxiously awaited the newest installments.
Yes, I went in the middle of the night when bookstores had special release hours, but No, I did not dress like a character from the stories...

I can't decide if that is pathetic or wonderful.
Pathetic because, well really? Books?
Wonderful because, well, Really! Books!
They take you places, let you be someone else, teach you and stimulate your mind to ask questions and find answers.

I AM A NERD! It's official.

There are over a thousand books in our home and more than half belong to me. My son owns the other half, easily. AND he remembers all the names and story lines and authors!
Me? I'm lucky if I can remember the picture on the front of the book.

And I don't even want to talk about books that my daughter AND my father have read that I own. I am embarrassed that my daughter read some that should seriously be rated-XXX then I go visit my Dad and he's sitting on the sofa reading the same darn thing! How does that conversation go?
'So Dad, what'd you think about the one where the detective is dating a vampire and a werewolf and she is a wereleopard who has to have sex to live like a vampire needs blood? '
Um, definitely NOT. And WHY is my dad reading these books anyway? Christine Feehan, Nora Roberts, Sherrilynn Kenyon -do these names sound like the names of people who write books that someone who reads Zane Grey would want to read?

Maybe they do. Maybe I get my reading nerd genes from my dad... and that means my kids got them from me and we are all doomed
.
Book-a-holics Anonymous?
The premier chapter will be meeting in my living room to discuss the latest book read, er, I mean, to stop the addiction to books and all things book related-- right after I swing by the library and bookstore to pick up that new Stephanie Meyers title.

Veteran's Day... a lesson and a Thank You... No,Really!

Today is Veteran's Day.

A day set aside to honor those who have served to protect and defend our country.

Everyone knows that. We learned about it in grade school- you know back when the holocaust was real and the 'Cold War' was still being fought?

But what many people may not remember, or possibly never really learned way back when, is that Veteran's Day was originally Armistice Day.

What is Armistice you may ask... again because you were too busy watching Nixon being impeached on TV or listening to your grandfather rant how the Russians were planning to take over the world to remember what your teacher was telling you in school.

Armistice is a cessation of fighting by mutual agreement between all parties involved.

And Armistice Day was originally intended as a remembrance of the Armistice Treaty that went into effect at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month in 1918, thereby effectively ending the First World War... or as it was called by many, "The War To End All Wars"... well, until the next one that is.

So, November 11th at 11:00 am is when the guns stopped shooting and the soldiers stopped marching and the tanks stopped rolling in 1918. And those left standing were able to return to their homes and families in time for Christmas and the Peace-full New Year of 1919.

But the Armistice did not last because, well, let's face it, we ARE human after all, and eternal peace and happiness just aren't part of the genetic code of our species.

Someone had to decide they were "The Man" and start taking over the smaller and less adequately defended countries in Europe-- oh so slyly and quietly so that the bigger, badder nations across the globe did not realize exactly what was happening until it was almost too late.

And of course, The US being the Defender of the Defense-less, and Global Conscience that it is, we got involved. Oh- I mean before Pearl Harbor- we had pilots flying for the RAF out of Canada and Great Britain, we had intelligence personnel in Europe sending back some not-so-nice reports on Adolph and Friends and there were discussions in the governmental bodies about how and when we should intercede.

Then Pearl Harbor happened and just how much trouble Adolph and his Pals in Italy and Japan had gotten into became alarmingly apparent.

Thus the US was thrown into World War II, and although it was not our brightest hour, it was certainly not a good idea to piss us off from the get go.
Japan was not very smart about that, or they under estimated us as a military force? Maybe it is because we frown on killing perfectly good people by using airplanes as bombs like those crazy Kamakzi guys. But hey, maybe it was something else.

So WWII happened. Lots more of our young men died defending those in need across the globe against a mad man, who had some serious mental-health and self-love issues, because he could talk a good game.

That 'War to End All Wars' ended in 1945, and not a moment too soon for those interred in concentration camps across Eastern Europe.

In 1954- only 9 years after WWII ended and a year after the Korean Conflict- cuz I do remember learning in school that it was NOT a war, just a conflict where people got killed... a lot, had been ... er, un-conflicted?
Anyway- 1954 saw the signing of a bill making Veteran's Day a day to honor American veterans of all wars by Dwight Eisenhower, who was himself a great veteran and who said... ( I had to put a quote of his here because he is my favorite president)...
"On that day let us solemnly remember the sacrifices of those who fought so valiantly on the seas, in the air and on foreign shores, to preserve our heritage of freedom, and let us reconsecrate ourselves to the task of promoting an enduring peace so that their efforts shall not have been in vain."

Since that proclamation was made 51 years ago many more veterans have arrived on the scene... From the cuban conflict, Operation Desert Storm, Viet Nam, Operation Iraqi Freedom and so many more that I am sure We, The People have no idea ever happened.

For ALL of those Veterans I want to say thank you... and I include those who are left who bear a tatoo identifying them as true veterans of war because, unlike American History books who barely mention the "alleged holocaust" I believe that their lives were endagered, taken and tossed aside without care... and I KNOW that without OUR Veterans of that war, and the many since, history books the world over would be filled with more atrocities than even I can imagine, and let me tell you, I have a really good imagination!

So- Thank You to Marty, Vic, David, Steph, Dad, Uncle Dave, Wink, Mr. Schuyler, Matthew, Smitty, Charlie Cartwright- KIA Afghanistan November 2009, and those whose names I cannot remember and those whose names I have never known... you are ALL to me like family... the family of Man-Kind with the emphasis on KIND.

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle... and the Mortgage Company From Hell?

Here I sit, on my couch, under an afghan, watching tv while the sun is slowly coming awake to warm the chilly air outside and bring some light to the world.

I am curled up under an afghan because it was 33 degrees last night, leaving ice crusted over the garden pond, and we have a heat pump system that just does not seem able to keep the temps comfortable during freezing weather.

This bothers me immensely.

Oh, sure we can sit together as a family under blankets in front of the fireplace watching TV through the winter months, and honestly, we really do.

Not just because we love each other, but more importantly, because we need to be warm and need to keep the electric bill to a manageable amount. Last winter we had bills of 1000.00 and more per month. Nope, that is not a typo... it really was that high.

This year we have a new, highly efficient hot water heater and brand new high efficiency washer and dryer set to help off-set some of the cost of running our home during the colder months.

We have also converted almost all of the light bulbs to those curly ones and use re-chargeable batteries in most of the electronics on our home. We unplug the laptops and shut down the power strips that have the TV, DVD player and Wii systems plugged into them.

We are recycling just about everything we use... and it seems that our recycle trash is 3 times the amount of the regular trash! Who knew so much could be recycled?

All of these things we do to cut our costs, and lower the cost of living in general, quite willingly.

In our plan to down-size expenses and reduce waste we contacted our mortgage holder to find about modifying our adjustable interest rate loan last October.

When our loan was bought by one of the Chase companies our interest rate jumped considerably. We were given 30 days notice that the payment was jumping by nearly 800.00 a month. So I did what was being recommended and contacted them to try to fix things before they became a problem... I did say I did this a year ago, right?

Well, here it is 13 months later and we still have no modification of our loan. Not only do we not have a modification in place, but the payment plan- or the "trial modification period" as they call it- has actually hurt us more than it has helped.

When I called last year I was told what we needed to do to be considered for a modification and I did it. I have been on 4 of the "trial payment periods", each lasting 3 months so that the powers that be can see we are committed to paying our bill on time each month.

At the end of the 3 months the modification is supposed to be locked in and all will be well... or so I have been told. After 4 of these trial periods and dozens and dozens of pages being faxed multiple times to the Loan Modifcation account representative we still have no modification and I only recently found out we had no account representative. Or at least not the one I have been dealing with since March of this year.

It seems he was taken off our case in early October, but no one told us until the end of the month. Which explains why the 8 phone messages I left for him the month of October were never answered.

So in our attempt to be proactive and reduce expenditures and tighten our belts, we have only made our problem worse.

Our account is now being reported as 6 months in arrears because the reduced "Trial Period" payments are less than our regular payments and apparently our mortgager does not accept partial payments...
which is what they consider the reduced payments to be since we have not been locked into a modification program...
and that means they can charge us with fees for making these partial payments and late fees because we are behind because we did not make full payments...
and apparently the whole "You qualify for the Federal Loan Modification Program" conversation that I have had several times over the past 13 months is just that... a conversation as it now seems we do not in actuality qualify for it according to our mortgager...

so now what do we do???

Well... for anyone in this predicament- of which I am sure there are many- try using this link and signing the petition there.


PLEASE SIGN THIS PETITION TO GET CONGRESSIONAL HELP FOR HOMEOWNERS TODAY!!!

http://www.petition2congress.com/2/2564/petition-to-us-government-from-american-homeowners/


Then use the link to send a letter to your congressmen and senators to let them know that you need their help

I even added a personal note to the form letter to let them know that I have jumped through all the hoops and played by the ever-changing rules with nothing to show for it but a ruined credit rating and a house payment that has gone up once again.

I hope that my experience helps someone else as it does not appear it will be helping us...

But Hey! I still believe in Miracles ...

Mortgages and Nightmares- The Same Thing?

Just when you think everything you have worked so hard for is about to happen, it doesn't.
Has that ever happened to you? Well of course it has. And it leaves you feeling down and put upon to say the least.

I have been working with our mortgage company to get our adjustable rate loan modified since January of this year. Please note I said since January. That would imply that the process is not yet complete because it isn't.

I have filled out forms no less than 4 times, over-nighted and faxed them to our account manager multiple times and made dozens and dozens of phone calls requesting return calls to no avail, have gone through 4 of the required 3-month trial payment periods to find myself still waiting.

And just when it looks like the modification is finally done.... it's not.
A new account manager, more forms to fill out, more tax forms needed, more time, more money, more stress and anxiety...

And when it is all said and done what will we have?

That remains to be seen.... I'm off to fax yet another round of forms I have already faxed to answer questions I have already answered...

Finger's crossed...just one last time?

Now IS The Time...

It's 7:30 am and the kids have gone off to school in a mad whirlwind of book bags, brown paper lunch sacks with jackets trailing behind.

There was the usual morning tug-of-war to get them out of bed and into clean clothes, fed and appropriately groomed; the endless battle of wills to get them to put on jackets or hoodies before heading out into the cold, damp foggy morning. And now that they have left, en masse, the house is eerily quiet and calm.

So now is the time for me to get some work done. I have entered into a new financial endeavor, writing ads online. So far it has earned me 53.00 and cost me about 100.00. But the ads have only been up for a few days so I am still in the learning curve thing on how to make the ads catchy enough to generate more traffic to the merchandisers site.

Now is also the time for me to do some online reading on how I can use my writing skills to add to my income. Which at this point is non-existent so it can only get better, right?

I know a lot of you out there see the 'Work From Home' ads online all the time and are leery. Well, some of them are real and seem to actually work. At least they have for me thus far.
Don't get me wrong, it takes time and a certain ability to put words into some kind of sense that will catch the attention of John Q. Public, but other than that?

Well, it seems now is the time for me to try new things and think outside of the box....
Maybe Now is Your time too!

Family...ties that bind?

I recently took a 2 week vacation. I spent the first week with my 3 youngest children travelling to visit my sister for a few days, then going to my sister-in-law's for a few days before leaving with my sister-in-law and her kids for a 'Family' vacation on the Gulf Coast. My husband and his father joined the kids and I at my sister-in-law's home Friday evening. We then all packed up the vehicles and set out on our journey to the Gulf Coast to meet up with yet more family.
It was to be a fun-filled, action-packed adventure for the entire family! Do I sound like a commercial yet???
And in fact is was quite fun and adventuristic for just about everyone.
I was a bit distracted on several levels but had a really nice time visiting my sister before her mission trip ( and helping construct VBS craft kits) and then getting to spend a few extra days with my sister-in-law before our family vacation.
She and I had time to sit by the pool with coffee ( or wine depending on the time of day) in hand and enjoy the quiet and serenity of just being. Oh, you're wondering how I had the serenity thing going on when I was traveling with a 10,12 and 13 year old? One word- GRANDMA!
Yep- my mother-in-law took the kids on little outings during the day. A trip to the mall, to a movie, to her house to hang out and bake some cookies. What ever. She also took one or two of them to stay the night with her which made for much more peaceful bedtimes.
The money for this little vacation ( or as I like to call it VACATING my real life) was budgeted closely and I really did not want to over spend. AND my oldest daughter was expecting her first child- of course not for several weeks, but she was having some issues before I left so, Mom was worried.
We were doing really good in the budget department-able to eat out and do some little extras like mani-pedis with the girls, golfing for the guys and even a Guys Day at the spa for massages.
(And yes my husband enjoyed his!)
The kids got to go to a movie without an adult tagging along then to the pizza parlor for a little snack. Of course these are both located on the main street of the resort we were at and within our sight. But they were being given some responsibility and did really well with it.
I was able to relax and have some fun- thanks to the miracle of the cell phone.
And it seems that I was right to be worried and more than little pre-occupied.
Of course my daughter called me at 2am to let me know she was in the hospital with high blood pressure and was going to be induced- 2 weeks early. And I was 2000 miles away on the first family vacation in 11 years!
We did the labor support via cell phone and text message off and on through out the day, and shortly before 7pm my daughter gave birth to a beautiful 7.8 pound baby girl. I got the pictures on my cell phone while the adults were at dinner and the kids were at the movies. I was both relieved and upset -- thrilled to have everything be ok for baby and mom, but I was disappointed that I wasn't there when my daughter needed me. That I had missed this very important event in her life. The single most life altering and wonderful thing that can happen to a woman.
But in a way I think that my not being there was a good thing. Oh, not for me at all, but for my daughter and her husband. By not having "Mom the Nurse" in the room they had to ask questions, pay attention and work together as a team thru the contractions, the scary doctor language and the pushing and pain and WORK that is Having A Baby. And they came through with flying colors and a little girl with blue eyes and the sweetest little bow-shaped mouth... who looks EXACTLY like her mother did when she was born.
Side note: My daughter has often asked WHY I had her ugly baby picture hanging on the wall. I told her repeatedly because she was so cute. She now looks at the pictures of her infant daughter and sees her beautiful little girl. Funny how she still thinks her picture is ugly but her little girl- who looks like her clone- is precious and beautiful. She is starting to understand what I have been trying to explain all her life. She is my baby and to me is perfect and beautiful- no matter what.
Back to VACATING- the baby was born and celebratory drinks were had by one and all on the Gulf Coast, her picture on my cell was passed around the table several times, and the new aunt and uncles ( and Great Aunts and Uncle) spent the evening oooo-ing and ahhhh-ing over her and making fun of me- GrandMa. Although I refuse to be called GrandMa... I am still trying to come up with something better...
We spent the last few days of vacation relaxing pool side and shopping, then drove home. I was anxious to see the new addition to the family, and to see that my daughter was indeed doing well and being taken care of. Which she was- on both counts. And my grandbaby is perfect... well aren't they all? But she is especially more so than other babies I am certain.

Now we are back at home and back into our Real Lives... and I dream of when I can next go VACATING... and of the family here in my home, and close by. Of my sister and her family 600 miles away, of my in-laws in the place they have only recently come to realize is Home, and of my husband's brother and his family 1200 miles away- all of us living our lives day to day, all of us taking time when we can to touch base with each other on the phone, in email, via text or on FACEBOOK... we take the time to connect... to keep the ties that bind secure and intact... to keep the family together, even when we are apart.

Thinking too Hard? Or not Enough?

I will admit that in recent years I have wondered if I have missed my calling, or more so, perhaps I am being called to something more but have not yet answered...
my most fervent wish in life is that I make a difference in someone's life, that the lessons I have learned- most heartbreakingly- will be able to be turned into something helpful and positive to others...
Ok- it is time for me to go back to reading my email and stop philosophizing... or thinking so hard.
My weekend was quiet and productive. Steam cleaned an entire room, scrubbed all the hardwood and kitchen floors, cleaned out the cabinets and washed all the dishes in the back of said cabinets that were covered in dust and pollen and other... cleaned the pool then sat by said pool and read, not one, but two books.
But best of all, I got to spend the early morning hours outside enjoying the cool breezes, pale sunlight filtering thru the hazy clouds and listening to the music in the voices of the tree frogs, hummingbirds, chickadees and pileated woodpecker ( that insists on tapping away on my shingles!) and acknowledging that my wants will come when it is time (but darn it the lottery or a contract on my house NOW would be wonderful).
I am always telling my children that things happen for a reason, we just do not always understand or know the reason at that time. I also tell them that things work out the way they are supposed to, when they are supposed to. This is a lesson I have been privy to over and over again all my life, and one that I am still trying patiently to learn.
In the words of the great music legend, Freddy Mercury, I Want It All and I Want It Now!